inadequacy

failure feelings at an all time high whenever i do accounting. spent a good deal of recess week doing major catching up on this module and here i am trying to do the ridiculous 40 page latest tutorial in an attempt to finally step into my thursday accounting tutorial classes prepared and not lost. instead, one question in and i am already struggling. i don’t know why i bothered with all the connect online assignments because obviously my fundamentals are fundamentally wrong. feeling very frustrated and honestly sick of this feeling of inadequacy and basically feeling that i am not in control of things. feeling like i came into the wrong course because clearly i’m just not cut out for this.

this isn’t the first time in weeks that i feel so helpless and so frustrated at a piece of paper. i hate the way i’m letting this affect me – always a firm believer of ‘you choose to let things affect you’ but obviously i am highly demoralized and am letting myself wallow in this sad sick pit. i just feel like it’s being realistically sad – i can spend a week on this and still get nowhere.

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